Day 29 #NHBPM: Learning to Be Content

Prompts: “If I could accomplish anything in 2013…” or Write about unexpected blessings of your health condition.

Last week, when I looked at the prompts for the remainder of the month I thought “Or the 29th will be easy. My goal for 2013 is to compete in a figure competition”.  Then yesterday happened….

If you did not notice, I basically fell off the face of the social media planet – no Tweeting, no blogging, no changing my Facebook status. Why?  Simply put, yesterday I was too busy dealing with life to blog about it.

For the past few weeks, I have had this nagging sense of unhappiness. I tried to fix it with more workouts, girl’s nights, and cuddle time with my daughter, and even a spa day – but it lingered. Then it grew, and soon I found myself a huge ball of discontentment, anger, and sadness.  Last night, I unleashed it all on my poor, unsuspected husband.

We did not have one of those screaming, shouting fights you see on television.  Rather, it was short sentences, punctuated with tension, uttered while trying to feed our daughter dinner and get ready for church.  It peaked with him telling me that I never seem content with anything.  And I fired off that he was crazy.

Then we went to church.

Pasting on smiles, we took care of our responsibilities.  But I could not shake his words.  I began to take stock of my life – I have a job I love, my daughter is a nearly perfect child and I adore her, but I nag Micheal all the time, complain about our never ending list of home improvement projects, and am never happy with my fitness level at that moment.  As much as I wanted my husband to be wrong, I realized he was right. While I am happy with my life, I am not content with it. And in turn, I had led him to believe that I was neither happy nor content with him.  I knew I had to find Micheal.

After 10 minutes of searching, I found him sitting in our church’s old sanctuary. His face was etched with paint and anguish – much like my own. So I sat down beside him, and in the glow of the pulpit lights….we talked…and talked…and talked.  And we figured out some issues, created a game plan to address them, and found some solace.

So what’s that long winded recap of yesterday have to do with today’s prompt?  Everything! I have a new goal for 2013 – to learn to be content.  Yes, I have goals/dreams/aspirations.  There are changes I want to make to my body, my mind, my home, my blog.   However, I want to truly be happy with where I am and what I have been given in THIS moment.

Contentment – that’s my goal for 2013. What’s yours?

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2 thoughts on “Day 29 #NHBPM: Learning to Be Content

  1. Pingback: Day 30 #NHBPM: I AM AWESOME | redefiningkim

  2. Pingback: It is not just about me…. | redefiningkim

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